I had the same problem with Cream cheese icing. Than I read thread on another cake site and someone gave me their recipe and some tips that has worked great for me. I have made this recipe 3 times and it was stiff enough to pipe, etc.
1 8oz. cream cheese
2 sticks (8oz.) salted butter
2 lbs. powdered sugar
whatever flavoring you like
cream together cream cheese and butter. Add powdered sugar one cup at a time and add flavoring.
The thing that I think really made the difference is she said DO NOT over mix the cream cheese and butter.
I just mixed it until it is just mixed. The more you mixed the CC and butter the more it breaks down and
softens. I really think that is the trick to cream cheese icing more than the recipe. Also do not let your butter
get really soft before you start to mix it. I hope that helps. In my photos you can look at my pumpkin cupcakes. I used this recipe for them and you can see the icing is nice and stiff. I have a photo of a basket of Thanksgiving cupcakes with cream cheese icing and it is too soft using my old recipe and technique.