I think perhaps its nearly full? Is it possible for some of thoughts and memories to fall off the end of that little bar that holds all the coloured sections?

At this very moment it is midnight and I am sitting on the lounge typing up recipes for a new cookbook, watching my facebook page beacuase I have recently entered a cake into a Cake challenge competition for Lifestyle food, googling Canadian Poutine – beacause the television is on and Andrew Zimmen is in Montreal in Canada and I really want to make it for the kids. I’m thinking about folding those clothes that I can see out of the corner of my eye. They are spilling out of BOTH the baskets that are sitting on the floor while the dog sleeps on top of the winter uniforms that the girls have to wear to school tomorrow – I’ll have to dehair them in the morning!!!!. I can hear the washing machine running in the laundry and I just KNOW the girls stockings and the Frustrated Painters socks will be in there. If I don’t wait for them to finish and then run them through the drier, there will be tears and tantrums in the morning.

I have time, I can wait, I still have recipes to type …. because I forgot what I was doing earlier ? Was it typing recipes or starting those sugar flowers for one this weeks cakes Unfortunately the storage manager was nowhere to be found last week and I have overbooked myself this weekend. Some of those thoughts and memories have definitely fallen off the edge of my brains coloured bar and left me with a day late recipe deadline and OH so many cakes :)

THis is so I remember my own name LOL

X Wish me luck

Ahhhh Kiama. Sleepy little hollow, here I come.

With the pick and delivery of the forgotten concert tickets organised and the 2 wedding cakes done and dusted, I found myself finally relaxing a little ….. Yes, just a little :) My family don’t really understand how any of us Mum’s can relax when we are all together as there are 21 kids aged from 4 to 13 years old, when we are a complete group. We have done it since the first borns were first born and have a few rules when it comes to the care of that many kids. Any child is fair game for any parents discipline AND one in all in or it doesn’t happen. One set of rules for all kids (in appropriate age groups) from all families, when we are together!!!! Needless to say, over the years there have been a few moments of panic when the head count doesn’t match the paper work but all in all our stats are good. We have put in a lot of effort to make it work over the years and it’s starting to pay off in the form of slight relaxation …... Beach swims, swimming pool, cheese and bikkies, champagne and coffee runs.

Two days of this, a Reece Mastin concert, an awesome day at Jamberoo with 16 of our kids and then it happened …............ the MELTDOWN!!!!!

At about 6pm on the third night, before dinner and before dark, my phone beeped at me. NEVER not on my person, I am always at hand to answer a message, email or phone call. This was the call of the email and the contents caused a Meltdown. Ironically it was a meltdown that caused the meltdown. I had already spent several hours on the phone to my beautiful mother the evening before as I could feel the weight of 2012 slipping into 2013 where it didn’t belong and this email became the straw that broke the camels back.

Written by the ever-cheerful Bride, Bexy, it said and I quote

“just wanted to let you know that the cake did not survive – it collapsed a few hours before we were due to cut it and even though the Chef did a great job of making it look presentable I was quite shocked and dissapointed when I saw it :( “

The email did go on to say how everybody enjoyed the cake, that is tasted delicious and that nothing could have ruined their beatiful day!!!! But in my state, I didn’t see those sentences as the email had me at “collapsed” and I was out the door and off into the distance ….....

ARTISTST IMPRESSION
2 hours and a search party later, my long time friend found me perched on a chair at the top of the cliffs, watching the waves and wondering how CAKE could have done this to me?? Perhaps I should move into the modelling of clay cakes, carved styrofoam or cardboard …... In the case of Sydneys Record Breaking 46 degree day, those cakes probably would have imploded, spontaneously combusted or caught fire anyway. Bexy and I agreed, although dissapointing at the time, her cake will become wedding legend and of those stories that will make their day even more memorable.

For me it will become the cake that proves chocolate ganache MELTS at room temperature (as does the cake it surrounds) when room temperature is no longer room temperature but Mothers Natures idea of a joke!!!

X Nadia

So continues the story of my worst disaster to date….................

Always the passenger when the Frustrated painter is in the car, it wasn’t till we had been on the road for about an hour that I realised there was trouble brewing in the back…... turning to check on the quietest passenger we have ever carried, I noticed something looked odd. My cake was leaning to one side. With all four kids farmed out to my sisters house on this beautiful Friday, there was noone in the back to keep an eye on this baby and ..well.. it was misbehaving.

With a shriek of panic, I jumped straight into the back to sort out the situation, quickly realising it was more situation than I was hoping to find. By 10:30am the day had already hit about 40c plus and the ganache in the cake had started to melt and the cake was stuggling to keep standing. Dissolving into tears, I lost all hope and cried for several minutes before pulling myself together and doing my best to support the cake for the rest of the trip.
At 11am we were driving into the beatiful surrounds of the Montrose Berry Farm at Suttons Forrest. Spotting a beautiful stone building buzzing with activity, I felt inspired and positive I would be able to sort the cake and its situation out!! Hope diminished a little when I discovered the stone building with big barn doors was the reception room and contained not a single unit of airconditioning. My iphone told me it was now 42c and it was only going to get hotter.

Although not airconditioned, the room was cooler than outside due to a cross breeze flowing through those big barn doors and I spent the next hour in moderate comfort, repairing, primping, preening and adding extra support to the wedding cake. I finished it off by pinching a few silk flowers from the table arrangements to cover up any blemishes and tied it all together with lemon coloured ribbon. With the customary photos taken and a few last minute looks over my shoulder, we said Goodbye to the Stunning Bride to be, Bexy and we left the farm house about an hour later, confident it was a job done well and that the cake was saved.

OH but that Mother had other plans and she hit her peak and a new record at about 3pm at a scorching 46 DEGREES!! It was so hot outside it actually felt like your legs were on fire and it literally took the breath from your lungs! My mind wandered to that cake perched precariously on its foundations and hope to God it be OK, Suddenly sidetracked by the thought of also having to pack for myself and four kids, for our trip down to Kiama, I let the disaster of the morning slip from my mind and set my attention on the ganache covered wedding cake that I still had to complete for the following days delivery.

With the ganache cake safely on its way to Taronga Zoo the next morning and the kids and I safely on our way to Kiama, a coffee in my hand and my body preparing to relax, my mind turned to the items packed in the Landcruiser. Bags, cossies, towels, champagne, nibblies…. “S**T”!!! to which my kids now answer, “What did you forget Mummy?” I found several F Bombs and some more uninvited tears but NO Concert tickets!!!!!! ARRRGGGGHHHHHH ….. Seriously?? What next???? But wait….. theres more….....

I don’t think I have ever felt as nervous as I did when travelling to the first day of the Myer Emporium Shoot. Having been on countless shoots over the years in Sydney, I have become used to knowing the people I work with. If I didn’t know the photographer, then I knew the stylist, or the art director or at least had worked in the studio before, but this was so different. In a different city, in a privately owned home, with 2 photographers, a stylist, the stylists assistant, an art director, Myer product person and another person or two (I’m not entirely sure what their job description was) that I did not know, nor had I EVER met a single one of them before. Not only was I in unfamiliar territory but I felt the pressure of performing – I had been flown in as an “expert” and did not feel like one.

The stylists assistant also became my assistant and the three of us took over the house, set up our temporary kitchen, and set to to work turning ingredients into photo worthy creations designed to sell the products they were displayed on and in and the tools they were created with.

Cupcakes, cake pops, cookies, Dolly Varden, fondant cakes, piped roses, stripes, shells, draping, butter frosting, chocolate ganache, royal icing and on and on and on. I had to dig deep down into the cake well and pull every decorating method and I was ever taught or learnt by osmosis and those I needed refreshing on became the youtube entertainment for a quiet Saturday night alone in St Kilda!! Just picture me sitting alone in my hotel room at the Novotel with a bottle of wine from the mini bar watching a kid called Sanjay, on Youtube, pipe a Hydraenga cupcake and like me, it would be the moment that you realised I had truly made it! lol

Day two was a blur of royal icing, fondant, Sunbeam and Wilton products and a 3pm deadline. I was literally putting the last cake on set as the stylists assistant I had borrowed was putting my jacket on my back, Sunnies on my head and pushing me out the door to the car that was waiting to take me to the airport. It was a very different car ride from three days earlier. Nerves were replaced with relief and fear with the excitement of getting home to the kids. With a good 40 minutes up my sleeve, I sat at the airport cafe, drinking a well deserved cappacino and then headed to the my Gate to chill and play with my phone. Too much relief obvioulsy effected my eyes and apparently I misread my boarding pass. All that R & R was replaced with stress and panic as I realised it was MY name they were calling over the loudspeaker at the airport. I was sitting in Gate 1 instead of Terminal 1 Gate 27 and the plane was ready for departure!!! Jacket and bag in hand, I took off running along the moving footway when I realised my ever-present Mobile was NOT present, forcing me to make a incredibly inconvenient detour. Back on track, I ran the whole way, to the soundtrack of my name being called, backed by the beat of my heart in my ears, eventually arriving at Gate 27, out of breath and exhausted…....

Next time somebody chooses to fly me somewhere as an expert, I hope the assistant they lend me, not only pushed me out the door but takes me all the way home.

Tears and Tantrums, Cakes and Parties, Books and Magazines and work trips to Melbourne. Love and Loss and Dreadful Navigation. By the time Christmas Day had arrived, December alone, had seen me spend 4 days in Melbourne, watch all 4 kids in their Acro concert, host a twirling Christmas Party, attend school presentation, make and deliver a wedding cake, attend the ABIA awards night as a nominee. Watch one of the kids in a musical theatre concert, make and deliver another wedding cake and a birthday cake, attend another Christmas concert, make and deliver 330 corporate cupcakes, make another 90 cupcakes for and attend the year 5/6 farewell, make a combined 16th/4th birthday cake, make a three tiered cake for and host my big girls 13th Birthday party, attend yet another Christmas party and then prepare for Christmas Eve and Christmas Day, both at our house!!!!!!!! Boxing Day and a day “off duty” brought about the sharing of way too many bottles of champagne with one of my Besties, skateboarding down the street and hanging out with the kids on the road…...Oh and a rather queasy stomach, a nasty headache, phone calls I probably shouldn’t have made and a series of photos I don’t remember taking or smiling for :). OH DEAR!!!!

To finish off this never ending December and the night before we left for our Summer holidays, I had yet another 30 cupcakes to make and a birthday cake to decorate complete with hand made sugar elephant holding a helium Balloon aloft in its trunk. Needless to say, the packing of ones bags for Qld and Fraser Island was put on the back burner but somewhere between the cupcakes and the Elephant I had no choice and the relatively simple act of packing a bag, became a complicated blur of socks, undies and Eleven pairs of pants but apparently NO COSSIES!!!!!! A single hours sleep and the job of loading the kids into the car for our 12 hour road trip rendered me as useless as tits on a bull and I spent most of the day in a semi comatose state, too tired to appreciate the fact I had nothing to do. I was strapped into the front seat of the Landcruiser and could not move, even if I’d wanted too.

2012, by far, the hardest year of my life, had nearly come to an end and I was determined to make sure 2013 was a little more normal. The year I put myself back together and at least, slowed down some of the disasters. In hindsight, I should have planned this new found “normal” for the Chinese New Year because the regular one didn’t start the way I had hoped.
2013 started as planned, on the first of January. Unfortunately for me, that day also came with an email from my elephant cake client informing me that one of the boxes of cupcakes did not make it to the birthday party and went on to outline her subsequent disappointment.
Being about 1000 kms away, with a large expanse of water separating us, there was little I could do about the rogue cupcakes, except to offer an apology and several reasons for their MIA status. Disheartened, I told myself, it was a simple mistake, just a little set back and this was not going to set the tone for the year. OH how I was mistaken …...

The first two wedding cakes of the year, booked in about 12 months ago and wedged between twirling training with International coaches and a Mum’s and Kids holiday down in Kiama, were made, packed and ready to deliver. Unfortunately, Mother Nature leashed her fury on us but felt letting me know the hottest day in Sydney’s history was about to hit, was not her priority, and the Frustrated Painter and I were left delivering a 3 tiered wedding cake, covered in kilo’s of chocolate ganache, fondant icing and sugared daisies, in 46 degree heat to a property in the Southern Highlands, to a beautiful stone reception room with NO air conditioning!!!!!!
OH and I thought Gingerbread house delivery was stressfull …........

I love that feeling when you stop and take a look around and say to yourself “How did I get here?” Perhaps I have the opportunity to experience these feelings more than some, because of the people I associate with, the certain groups I belong to or my job??

Over the years Baton Twirling has taken me to places and that feeling several times over…..... twirling at the Rugby Leauge, and AFL Grand Finals and running into several famous people, twirling at the Start of the then James Hardie 1000 and being allowed up the front, pressed against the fence and experiencing the absolute deafening roar of the start of the race. Performing Live on the set of “Live and Sweaty” with Andrew Denton, filming a commercial, performing in a show for one of our favourite Choreographers Paul, in an inner city studio crammed with people and most recently being part of breaking a Guinness World Record for Fire Twirling.

Cake has started to send me to that place recently too :) making the celebration cake for Funniest Home Videos 21st Birthday celebrations (although I had did have to accept that they would announce it was Julie from Materchef who made the cake), filming an episode of “Ready Steady Cook” (still to be aired) and have them talk about my cakes, delivering one of my cakes to the studio, to be on the Kerrie Anne Kennerly Show, shooting a print add for Getting Aussie Business Online featuring ME and my cakes and now today, being flown to Melbourne to work on a Shoot for a Myer Catalogue, advertising cake decorating equipment to be sold in store….....

As is the general theme of my blog, I could tell you of the disasters that went along with those “moments”. From being asked by Craig McLachlan where the toilets were and staring at him dumbfounded without answering, to at 16 years of age, falling down the hill at the Football in front of hundreds of boys, dressed only in a leotard, a baton and very little dignity!! What about asking the producer from the Kerrie Anne show what time hair and make up was only to be told there was a misunderstanding and it was only my CAKE that would be going on the show!!!!

I have spent the latter part of this Sunday on my own and wandering along Acland St in St Kilda, drinking coffee and taking photos of cakes and other fancies, mentally preparing myself for the task ahead.

Cross your fingers for me that the next two days will run smoothly and it will be one of the moments I step back and say “how did I get here?” and NOT “Oh God , how did that happen!”

Thinking how clever I was, that I had survived 3 weeks of a ridiculous amount of work, I excitedly planned my Monday about me. Sorting out taking the kids to school at 9am, then the dropping off of 3 custom made Ginger Bread Houses and then the treating of myself to a much deserved coffee or two with a friend or several friends and generally looking forward to a relaxing day all about me yet home in time to get all those kids from school.

An email late Sunday afternoon telling me the houses now had to be at the studio by 8:30 am threw a little spanner in the works. The Frustrated Painter inviting friends around on Sunday for lunch-turned dinner and a beer to watch “The Race” threw an even bigger spanner in the works. 6 hours of 7 children, 4 adults, a year 7 homework assignment, 2 random drop-ins and school uniforms and lunches to organise was like having a wrench thrown at my head and subsequently those bloody houses took another 12 hours to complete. BUT in bed by 12, which is highly unusual for me, I managed 6 hours of luxurious sleep and by 7 am I was focused, showered, dressed, hair done, face on and ready to go.
So the plan was: to drop them off (the kids that is) to a girlfriends house all dressed, hair done and loaded with fresh bread and pancakes (gluten free and normal). Kiss three of them goodbye, wish them luck on their first day back at school and then head to Newtown to drop the big one to school and then off to the Studio in Bourke St Alexandria to drop off my other three edible babies.

Everything went to plan until the part where I headed to the Studio. With a car full of gingerbread a head full of sleep deprivation, I lost my way. Instead of heading to Alexandria I took a wrong turn and found myself lost in a maze of one way streets and road works, desperately trying to navigate my way out. A cancelled coffee date and another wrong turn led me to Randwick and tears. Running an hour late and sitting at the lights at the Children’s Hospital I realised this was not the day I had planned.

Bitterly disappointed, lost and late, the sight of The University of New South Wales brought me back to reality and the right direction and I continued on the most massive of round-about-ways anyone has ever driven and finally turned into Bourke St. Just as I turned the corner, my phone whistled me with the msg “are you still coming?” as the largest of the three houses teetered on its foundations and crashed into the smaller one next door. Have you ever tried pulling over on a busy inner city Street, with precariously balanced precious cargo, tears streaming down your face and racing heart because there was no back up house!!!! Yeah well, me either.
By the time I finally arrived at the Studio, I was exhausted, miserable and a little deflated. Thankfully, the houses were met with Oohs and Aahs and the minimal damage to the back of the roof was easily fixed with the tools in my emergency kit. I salvaged what I could from my morning and managed a coffee and a chat with an old friend before I dropped into IKEA for a wander and lost my keys!!

Let me set the scene for you of an evening several years ago that still makes me cringe to this day. It was Thursday morning and with three of the four kids packed off to school and only one cake to complete I knew that “the Baby” and I could fit in a session at Mini Music. A time for Mums and Bubs to do some craft, eat morning tea together and then dance and jiggle away to music. It wasn’t until we got home about lunchtime that I realised I had actually double booked myself and all the time that I thought I had, I in fact, didn’t. 6:30pm and my appointment with the Bride-and-Groom-to-be came around quicker than humanly possible and I found myself, offering tasting samples and guidance, whilst still decorating a 3D Dora cake and managing all four kids (the husband was noticeable absent this particular evening).
Its a little difficult to maintain eye contact whilst talking up the 6 different flavours my Bride and Groom were sampling at the same time as attaching Dora’s head to her body, trying to finish her before the clients come to pick her up. BUT…... I gave it my best shot….discussing the strength of white chocolate ganache v’s dark chocolate ganache, I pushed Dora’s head down onto a wooden dowel and the two youngest chased each other around the kitchen. My hands, trying to create the perfect Dora, would not move fast enough and no matter how many times I looked at that clock, it just kept ticking. There was a distinct knock …... looking up, I was desperately hoping it was not the front door but rather one of my kids heads hitting the floor, as the fun and games had now turned physical and the giggles of delight hat been replaced with screams of frustration and pain as they wrestled each other to the ground.

Thankfully the Frustrated Painter walked through the door just before that fateful knock and he was on hand to welcome 2 more adults and 2 more children into the place of business cum wrestling arena. My Bride and Groom finalised their tasting and I wished them well as they left my house, more than likely concerned at how my house was run, let alone my business. The newest additions to the house were met with open arms…. Beer, football on television, coffee and several kids to play with. Chatting away as I finished off the grass around Dora’s feet, I vowed to take more care, never double book myself again and perhaps lock my children in cages or employ a WWF referee to live with us!!